Zoo of a Kind
December 23rd, 2011 – By Rob
I think the important thing, this being the holiday season and all, is to apologize. I’m not sure why I do the things that I do. But my mind goes to strange places and imagines stranger things, and at the end of the day, I am pretty sure that pandas are into really rough sex. I mean, they’re bears. Bears are sort of the unofficial mascot of this comic, I think. Birthday ones, polar ones, kinky sitcom-parodizing ones. But in a way, isn’t that how it is in life? We’re all just different kinds of bears, you guys.
And I know what you’re thinking. “Rob, there’s nothing in that paragraph that makes a goddamn bit of sense! You’re just filling up space with nonsense!” Au contraire, my friend. The thing is… no, that’s absolutely correct. I was going to lie to you, and that’s just not right. That isn’t the kind of thing I stand for and I’ll be damned if I’m remembered for being some fraud rather than who I know at the end of the day I really am. That I can stand up in the face of eternity and everyone in this world and say hey, dudes. Look at these crazy bears. They are so wacky, acting like people.
But in a way, isn’t that how it is in life? Maybe we’re all just bears… different kinds of bears- of varying size, color and porridge temperature preferences – pretending to be people.
Have a lovely, non-denominational holiday.