Zoo of a Kind
December 23rd, 2011 – By Rob
I think the important thing, this being the holiday season and all, is to apologize. I’m not sure why I do the things that I do. But my mind goes to strange places and imagines stranger things, and at the end of the day, I am pretty sure that pandas are into really rough sex. I mean, they’re bears. Bears are sort of the unofficial mascot of this comic, I think. Birthday ones, polar ones, kinky sitcom-parodizing ones. But in a way, isn’t that how it is in life? We’re all just different kinds of bears, you guys.
And I know what you’re thinking. “Rob, there’s nothing in that paragraph that makes a goddamn bit of sense! You’re just filling up space with nonsense!” Au contraire, my friend. The thing is… no, that’s absolutely correct. I was going to lie to you, and that’s just not right. That isn’t the kind of thing I stand for and I’ll be damned if I’m remembered for being some fraud rather than who I know at the end of the day I really am. That I can stand up in the face of eternity and everyone in this world and say hey, dudes. Look at these crazy bears. They are so wacky, acting like people.
But in a way, isn’t that how it is in life? Maybe we’re all just bears… different kinds of bears- of varying size, color and porridge temperature preferences – pretending to be people.
Thank you.
Goodnight.
Have a lovely, non-denominational holiday.
– Rob
14 Comments
I would like to thank Rob for finally writing some furry content. I’m hoping that by this time next month hatefarm will be the internet’s primary resource for cartoon furry animal sex. To all our readers out there: Your dreams CAN come true…
Nah man, if you want to be a primary resource for furry sex, you need to feature foxes having gay sex. There’s a formula to this. First, you need male or hermaphrodite (chicks with dicks) characters. Then the animal of choice needs to be a fox, tiger, skunk, or a dragon. Add hefty amounts of giant dicks and spooge. Voila. You will have crap tons of readers. Throwing in a fetish somewhere like diapers or vore will get you bonus readers.
The accuracy of that statement scares me in a deep and profound way.
After the mention of hermaphrodites here, I kind of wonder…Have you ever been tempted to tell one to go *f* themselves?
I ask mainly because I’ve never met a hermaphrodite, so I’ve never been tempted to ask the question…
oh I’m sure everyone can’t wait for all the murrypurry furry goodness
Pandas are notorious in the animal kingdom for having bad sex. They almost never have it. They are actually dying out partially because they almost never fuck. And when they do fuck, they have drama about the male being a “One Minute Man” who NEVER does foreplay and the female wishing she could go bang the grizzly in the other pen. HE’D care about whether she came or not.
I think they’ve just been sexually repressed into believing the kind of sex they want is wrong. Then again, I’m also an idiot.
I think a black bear would be more likely to care if the female panda came.
Well, I just got back from a fourious concert, switched on my PC and saw this. This comic stopped all my enthuiasm and made me fucking sad fot that cute animal. I hope that was your goal, cunts. Fapping now, leave me alone… poor Pandawoman.
Truly the work of a pair of dangerously-insane minds.
And that is why we love it so!
I have the awesomest boner right now
Ahhh. This reminds me of HumpHump the Giant Panda from Killfrogs glory days. I gotta be getting old if I am getting nostalgic about internet content.
Link: http://www.killfrog.com/02/canyouhear.html
Press cellphone button 4.
Happy Holidays!
This comic has a very Perry Bible Fellowship vibe to it.
This comic is false for the following reason: http://www.chinadaily.com.cn/china/2007-08/09/content_6018128.htm
On second thought, maybe this makes it more true? What else are you going to do with 3cm?