A Many-Splendored Thing
January 22nd, 2012 – By Rob
Greetings, internet weirdos! It’s your ol’ buddy Ron! I mean Rob. I could have corrected that typo manually, but I feel like I deserve to be chastised for my inability to spell my own fucking name. It’s only been 26 years with it, to be fair to myself. I’m still adjusting.
This comic was inspired by a very silly conversation I had with a friend of mine about a week or two ago, the initial concept having been a “self-defense” method that relies on lulling your opponent into a false sense of security before attacking them. Then, through the miracle of my keyboard, it turned into something much simpler and easily forgettable. I don’t want to get too behind-the-scenes here and ruin the mystique surrounding my brilliance, but I was eating a handful of gummy bears and listening to some music when it… just… hit me.
I jolted upright in my chair, clamoring for the keyboard before realizing I would first need to utilize my mouse to both pause and then minimize my open VLC media player. Now was not the time to continue my private Southland marathon, refreshing myself for the upcoming season. No, my friends. Now was not that time at all. My mind whirred with the possibilities – a wedding, the words “boo thang”, an out of place video game reference that almost certainly signifies I spend far too much time on my Xbox 360. These blessed, nimble little fingers of mine danced happily to the tune of my script. This is what the girl will say! And this is what that guy will say! And here is the panel where I awkwardly describe how I’d like Eric to draw that which, in my glorious imagination, has tickled me in the most pleasurable and yet non-sexual of ways. Yes, I was fully erect. But it was of profound coincidence.
Or perhaps not. Perhaps my bulging, swollen member was but another way of my body urging itself to unleash this creation upon the internet to be glanced over and forgotten without so much as a click of the “Like” button. My seed would be cast into the fertile womb of Eric’s doodly-box (or for your simple minds to comprehend, his artistic mind) and from the slick folds of his pen’s vagina would a gush of beauty spill on the canvas of his choosing. Then I think he just colors it in MSPaint or something. I honestly don’t know how he does it.
So yeah. That’s what goes on in my mind sometimes. Now, tell me a little about yourselves. Here is a photo of me looking interested in what you have to say to make you feel comfortable.
87 Comments
First, would you mind sharing those gummy bears? Second I think Eric uses Windows seven paint version, not the old one. Why, well its easy, how else could he make stuff look all fuzzy and twisted? Hahaha.
Still, I can’t make my mind up on whats the best thing about this site, the comic, or the comic description… mm… maybe neither.
Anyway, great webcomic as I always said. How about drawing a nice good ol’ kirby? I know you would love to draw that sucker (pun intended).
Oh, by the way, I wanna make a fan art/guest comic for ya. But I’m looking for some inspiration or an awesome idea. Any kind of kind words would help. Whats on your mind?
Follow your heart, dear Cav! I am going to try to learn Spanish just so I can read your site but I am willing to believe it is all very funny!
Ok, we’ll see what my twisted heart can come up with.
And thanks for the vote of trust on my work; just don’t get your hopes to high on it, hehe.
‘Til next time.
“genetic material receptacle”
SO ROMANTIC
though i would love to see this happen. like just walk by a church one day and just witness something like this.
i’d high-five the chick on her way out.
She looks so pleased with herself at the end of it. Like a Disney princess who don’t need no prince holdin’ a sista down.
oh yeah.
her face is a mask of pure joy.
Is it just me–or is the church cross flaccid?
Omg no way, they’ve never done such a thing before…
See, I saw the Facebook logo, but maybe that’s just me.
It’s never looked like that before! Maybe it just had too much to drink.
I bet you guys decided to use that Xbox 360 logo without the expressed written consent of Microsoft……CONSIDER YOUR ASSES SOPA’D
They’ll quickly learn the meaning of the phrase “don’t drop the SOPA”.
That is SOPA king stupid. …I guess that joke doesn’t work after all. Oh well, too late now! Thanks for commenting!
you’ve had this dream too? that’s awesome, although in mine she tears out of the dress into leather
She’s probably wearing leather somewhere. My original idea, to be honest, was her to just have a breakaway wedding dress but it’s hard to convey that sort of image.
The important thing is that “psyche” is still being yelled by somebody, even if fictional.
Am I the only one here who thinks that the groom looks a lot like Jim Carrey?
I can definitely see that. Did you hear his daughter is on American Idol? She looks sort of like him, too. I wonder if the tumblr url “peoplethatlooklikejimcarrey” is available.
Hey, you guys mentioned in a previous comic that you needed web hits. Here’s my idea: do more Skyrim comics, b/c that’s how I found your site. Just sayin’ Keep up the good work, you guys are crazy.
I found it through LICD.com
Thank you for the suggestion! I don’t like repeating sources of inspiration, personally, but you may be onto something there.
1) Comic erections are epic
2) Gummy bear eating while having a erection seems like it would be considered bestiality and pedophilia in a alternate universe.
3) I love your comics and the fact that both creators are cuties helps fill the void of my vagina.
Happy to fill your vagina!
O_O if only
This is the most horrifying webcomic I have ever seen. Please never stop making them. Ever. I love you.
You got it, dude. [Insert Olsen twin here]
The Action Dress Rip in the last panel makes my day with its apropos-osity.
I kind of wish the achievement would read “You Go, Girl!” after reading this. Goddamn it. Where were you when I needed you, Shoshanna?
I was most likely playing Skyrim. It’s kind of my entire social life right now. And that’s O-KAY!
Considering I only stopped playing Skyrim to eat and watch a movie so far today, I’ll agree wholeheartedly.
You have excellent punctuation. I don’t think that I’d realized how rare that is.
me NEither~!!1
Ahahaha. Droll.
I think I have you beat on Skyrim assimilation, though- I listened to the score today while making crab Rangoon.
Did he at least earn the achievement “emotionally damaged”?
I can only tell you that he is never going to not be paranoid again.
I often worry that while playing on the Internet (auto capitalize Internet? ridiculous.) I’m going to fall in love with dorky boys who rant in way similar to myself and make killer comics. today, my dear Rob, is that day.
thank you for your time.
Thank you for being so kind! If it wasn’t currently busy singing along to Billy Joel’s greatest hits, I would use my mouth to kiss you with!
brilliant.
As I look back upon my own wedding, I can’t help but think, man that is one lucky guy….
Was the priest/rabbi/midget or whatever you used as giddy at your wedding? Look at that guy, he’s having a great time before the twist happens.
Anyway, sorry about your marriage! Keep reading! Maybe our next dick joke will awaken something in you.
Maybe your next dick joke can awaken something in my wife, ha!
ha
Wow, Love the comic, guys! Great humor (in a 666 kind of way), and awesome coloring. Will keep checking this shiz out!
Long live the fucking Beast!
A little about myself? Well. Since you asked, and look so very interested: I’m a Russian test-tube baby; my hobbies include wrangling ocelots, and quietly waiting for death; I have an allergy to lead (too much can be fatal); and I have this terrible habit of losing my train of
funny, I have a terrible habit of losing trains.
In Soviet Russia, tubes test you!
Hi, i am an aspiring artist. I hope to work as an concept artist. I try to draw everyday but there are things that i cant control, college, job thing, and video games (they warp my fragile wittle mind).
You could always try being homeless, scrawling your vision onto the easily marked skin of your bean-eating, garbage-dwelling companions with greasy fingernails.
No, i couldnt be homeless. My asain friend already is a hobo in training.
It’s how I should of done it.
There’s always second chances.
It is never too late! get smacking.
Loved it, great payoff in the final panel. Genetic material receptacle & every stretchable hole really did me in.
I hope they work on any potential spouses of mine, as well.
I feel like my mind is being raped every time I read one of these comics, but I LOVE IT. Please never quit :]
Only because you asked so nicely.
“Mayonaise”, don’t forget.
Don’t tell Eric, but I think you are way more sexy than him.
It can be our secret, baby.
Don’t tell Clueless, but his or her alias infers that they have no idea what they are talking about.
You had me at “genetic material receptacle.” This made my day, and between the Disney princess look and the x-box achievement was the metaphoric icing on the moist cake.
“In every stretchable hole…”
That’s going to be written into my vows.
And a lucky person on that altar will be.
The wedding cartoon was the first of your offerings I have encountered. As amused as I was, I found your comments and the wall hanging in the background far more amusing!
hope this doesn’t hurt too much.
looking forward to more strips…
I’ve been given a lot of shit over my choice in decor. It’s a bit of a mantra for me because “when the laughing stops, the incessant screaming within takes over” didn’t have as pleasant of a ring to it.
Keep reading! It’s one of the top ways doctors recommend to prevent eyeballs from just falling out of the skull.
You are a sexy beast, Rob
Thank you, kindly.
The single most influential web comic of all time.
You sure Skyrim wasn’t somewhere in your mind when you had this epic epiphany? ‘Cuz like, seriously, there shoulda been an achievement on that game for leaving your spouse-to-be at the altar as well… And I would picture it happening just like that….
Sophia looks like Princess Clara from Drawn Together, particularly in panel four.
Anyone else remember that show?
The entire personality reminds me of her from the last season.
You only make comics so you can have conversations with people in the comment section. I’m on to you.
You are certainly onto me. Please tell me your favorite color.
Sirs, I have come to fall in love with everything about this comic. It now sits upon a pedestal, that pedestal being the top of my favorites list.
Xenu be with you.
Nowhere to go but down from here!
I’ve already hit rock bottom good sir. If I was any…errm..bottomer I’d be looking at the bottom of my own shoes haha!
Achievements in life would be a good thing for people in society these day’s.
Your photo definitely works as intended, maybe a little too well.
oh god… i just noticed they have only 4 fingers, which is fine, it normally looks odd when people try to fit all five, but it makes the priest look like an alien in the third panel.
..scary
This vaguely reminds me of early parts of aliens vs monsters. When the bride grows gigantic.
Ha! Great strip. BTW she looks like a Disney’s character. Did you deliberately drew her like that or was it just coincidence?
Dude. You guys are fucking hilarious. Been reading for a while. As a female I personally find this comic very satisfying. “Genetic material receptacle”…I bet he says that to all the girls.
Great stuff overall, keep up the good work you guys.
About myself? I’m a 21 year old female. I go to college and pretend to learn shit so I can graduate a receive a piece of paper that says I’m a functional member of society. My middle name is Danger.
wow. And you thought keeping your last name was bold!
She could have waited until AFTER they were married and then taken him for everything he had! SUPER COLD AS ICE!
I love it so hard! I must now go eat my own gummies and listen to Cold as Ice by Foreigner now!
Foreigner, eat your damned hearts out.